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On our third date, he proposed something unexpected. ” We were sitting on the floor of his living room on one of the first warm nights of spring, plates of grilled chicken thighs, Greek salad, buttery pita, and garlicky tzatziki balanced in our laps. Recently, I’d noticed a pattern in my dating habits. If we needed something in between from one another — even if that was just to say hello—we would call.I sipped my wine, and was, perhaps, slightly buzzed. I’d meet someone, and next thing I knew, we were texting more frequently than I text my best friends. We would keep texting to logistics, like if one of us was running late, or if we needed the other to pick something up a key ingredient, like limes for the gin and tonics or American cheese for the burgers, on the way over.Guilt that I’d put him through the turmoil, but frustration over the responsibility of dealing with another person’s emotions at a time when I felt so drained.On an impulse, I dialed him right then and broke things off.

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Before We Get Started: Quality Interactions Get Quality Numbers I talk to tons of guys who go out for the night and spend the evening trying to get as many numbers as they can. As with most valuable things in life, quality trumps quantity.I’d just made a career change and had a new block of free time. The less we were in touch, the better it was once we were together. I was eager to use that time exactly how I wanted: reading, writing, eating, cooking and exploring my city on my own time. Conversation poured out of us as if we had been turned upside down. Anticipation took that anxiety’s place: I was excited to tell him about all the things I was reading, seeing, and doing. You’re out at a bar, and you meet an awesome new woman.

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