Fat guys guide to dating

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After deciding to enroll at Towson University, friends of mine joked about me going to “the hood” and the violence in the Baltimore area, but I was never worried.

Fitting into this lifestyle felt more natural to me than living in Rochester ever did.

It put me in a box, limiting me in ways I didn’t realize until recently.

The more attention I received from black men, the less white men wanted to talk to me, as if I had been eternally branded as a traitor.

Friends asked me what it was like dating someone who is black and giggled asking if it was true about “what they say about size.” One friend admitted “I could never date a black guy because I wouldn’t be able to understand what he was saying.” All stereotypes I had been used to hearing about this unchartered territory.

The first time I had ever questioned my physical appearance was before I even began first grade.

I felt a certain pride in hanging out with people who were Dominican, Indonesian, Laos, Filipino, Hispanic, etc. My parents taught me good morals, like not judging others by their appearance, though I did have to keep my jaw clenched when I visited relatives.

They would ask me about the “colored kids” at my job as a camp counselor and spoke the word “bi-racial” in hushed tones, as if it were something to be ashamed of.

While some people smiled at us as we held hands in D. or walked side by side around the Inner Harbor, others just stared with disapproving eyes.

The thing is, people were tolerant, but they were not always accepting.

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